Quick-Hit Summary

Want to keep your new relationship feeling fresh and strong? Prioritise:

• Spending quality time (presence > duration)
• Keeping communication open and playful
• Creating rituals of connection (small daily habits)
• Bringing novelty and adventure into your relationship
• Focusing on emotional and physical intimacy

The spark never dies—it evolves. With imagination and intention your relationship can be even more powerful.

Those first few months of a new relationship are exhilarating. You can’t stop thinking about each other, every message is an electric spark, and even running errands together feels like a special event.

Yet many new couples quietly ask themselves: what if the spark fizzles out after the “honeymoon phase”?

That anxiety is understandable.

• Research shows the initial thrill of infatuation — fuelled by oxytocin and dopamine — naturally fades with the passage of time.
• Psychologist Arthur Aron‘s self-expansion theory proposes couples who create together through experience and novelty are more satisfied in the long term.
• The Gottman Institute also learnt that couples who make a conscious effort to keep a relationship novel and exciting report much higher stability and satisfaction.

Here are 5 science-backed suggestions to help you build romance, avoid pitfalls, and build a deeper connection.

1. Prioritise Quality Time

Time is the best present in a relationship — but it’s the quality, not the quantity, that matters.

• Research Insight: Gottman Institute puts “love maps” — knowing your partner’s reality by making concerted time together, first.

Practical Ideas:

• Have regular date nights (grand or small).
• Try a new experience together like cooking, dancing, or visiting a museum.
• Create a no-phone area during meals or at night.

Presence will beat duration. Even 20 minutes of focused attention builds emotional and romantic intimacy.

2. Keep Communication Open and Playful

Communication is the heartbeat of passion, and it shouldn’t all be serious — teasing and light-hearted banter help keep love alive.

• Research Insight: Couples who make everyday gratitude a priority experience more satisfaction (Journal of Social and Personal Relationships).

How to Keep It Light:

• Text flirtatious messages instead of simple logistics.
• Leave thank-you notes in their bag or on the fridge.
• Convey small details about your day with enthusiasm.
• Engage in light teasing to build intimacy.

Talk like lovers, not roommates. Use endearing, questioning, and playful language.

3. Create Rituals of Connection

Grand gestures are great, but it’s the small, daily habits that keep romance alive.

• Research Insight: The Harvard Study of Adult Development found that daily rituals of connection strengthen relationships and make individuals happier.

Romantic Ritual Ideas:

• A morning peck before starting the day.
• A weekly coffee or walk date that you both make time for and maintain.
• A shared playlist of songs that remind you of each other.
• A night-time routine check-in — share one positive and one challenging part of your day.

Rituals create predictability and excitement. They constantly remind your partner, day in and day out: I choose you.

4. Experience Novelty and Adventure

Want to make your relationship front-page news? Introduce novelty. The brain connects novelty with excitement and attraction.

• Research Tip: Aron’s self-expansion theory suggests that novel, shared activities boost dopamine — the same chemical responsible for those early-stage “feels”.

Adventure Plans:

• Cook a new dish together.
• Plan a surprise day trip or activity.
• Take up a new hobby as a team (painting, yoga, salsa).
• Explore a new town or city.

Tip: Anniversaries are too distant and infrequent. Small, regular adventures also create lasting memories and help keep your relationship sparkling.

5. Embrace Emotional and Physical Intimacy

Romance works when lovers feel emotionally connected and physically desired.

• Research Tip: The Archives of Sexual Behavior concluded that couples who engage in regular physical affection (hugging, kissing, holding hands, etc.) are most satisfied.

How to Intensify Intimacy:

• Be open about boundaries and desires early in the relationship.
• Show daily affection — hugging, kissing, cuddling together.
• Create space for vulnerability by sharing personal feelings.
• Strike a balance between fun and depth — mix humour with deep conversation.

Physical touch and emotional closeness combined create the foundation of a long-term romantic relationship.

Conclusion: Keeping the Spark Alive

The thrill of a new relationship doesn’t have to fade away — it can evolve into something deeper and more lasting.

By keeping in mind:

• Quality time
• Playful communication
• Connection rituals
• Novelty and adventure
• Emotional and physical intimacy

…you can nurture your romance, keep your relationship fresh, and develop a solid connection.

Romance isn’t about one big gesture — it’s the daily effort to make your partner feel valued.

Next Step

Want to go deeper? Watch out for Your Fulfilling Life’s online and in-person courses, where you’ll learn practical, research-backed strategies to keep your relationship thriving.

And if this post inspired you, share it with other new couples who want to keep their spark alive.

About Your Fulfilling Life’s Expert

Dr. Joanne Milner is a Clinical Psychologist and co-founder of Your Fulfilling Life. She has almost 30 years of experience helping individuals and couples overcome personal and relationship challenges, and has appeared as an expert psychologist on television. Joanne is committed to empowering individuals to create healthier relationships and more satisfying lives.

Joanne has a thriving private clinical practice in the Lake District, England. To discover more about the services she offers, please visit Cumbria Psychologist.